I am attracted to Red She-Hulk

 Yeah i know its the third post today, but i dont care. i have a crush. i know she isnt real, but she makes a brief light in my dark life. i strive to be like her, even when she's evil, cause part of being a vampire is being evil. 

I like strong, powerful, and smart women, smart in a way like they actually know things. most people are fucking stupid, but thats ok, as long as they arent a fucking asshole. red she hulk is smart and an asshole, so i like her. shes like me. im an asshole on purpose because im a vampire and i need to drink blood. shes an asshole because she's red and needs to smash people. being a hulk isnt easy. i know this because i basically am the hulk. people want to fucking kill me unil they realize i will fucking kill them and suck their blood. 

she also somehow just knows everything. like me. i feel the kind of happiness you feel that makes you cry. just like the one-winged dove, sings a song sounds like she's singing. im going to cosplay as red she hulk in public when i go out to drink people's blood. maybe ill get on the news, and then people will show up to my house when i dont want them to and fucking poke holes in me with wooden steaks. it doesnt kill me, it just hurts. fucking annoying. im thinking of making a short film about red she hulk. i will post it to youtube when im finished with it. men have their wives, i, not a man, have my crush. i am not a man i am a vampire. just to clarify. 

thanks for listening to me talk about my new fixation, you are my next prey. I'll see you on animal planet when i rip your guts out of your neck, and slurp loudly on the blood of your organs. *swoons*