Returning to darkness

I was feeling good for a bit and then the wires came and made me LOSE IT again and I had TERRIBLE NIGHTMARES and now the darkness of the night is calling me to BITE people again. At this moment the OCD is really bad I’m not just doing things three times I’m doing them like 6-9 times or more. It’s so annoying. I’m freaking the fuck out and I want to murder people again. Like go out and find every sicko on the planet and obliterate a large portion of them. I don’t remember what the wires are but I found a picture I drew on my phone of them and it looks like music bars going through my head I wonder what that means. I may remember again if I slip into complete insanity again. 

I wonder what I was trying to tell myself.

I remember there were real wires though. Those were real wires. I could control them. That was when that woman was there. I think she made the other wires ring. Or maybe that was venom. I’m going to go to sleep and this time with duck tape on my ears s I can’t so I can’t hear the train passing overhead. I can still hear the vibrations though. I mean feel. Maybe I need to slow down a bit. Don’t go chasing waterfalls. Well I’m not chasing a waterfall more like uh… I don’t know. But it’s not a destructive path. But I think thinking too much makes my brain crazy. And then it needs more blood. Like a zombie. 

Emo for life punk rock and bowl. 🧛🏿‍♀️💜